Radical: adjective1. thoroughgoing, thorough, complete,total, comprehensive, exhaustive,sweeping, far-reaching, wide-ranging,extensive, across the board, profound,major, stringent, rigorous.
(Want a short cut? Start here!)
Since the early 1900’s we’ve heard about the concept of “recovery”.
Bill W. and Carl Jung wrote the book on it.
And while a hundred years ago, their model of addiction as a brain disease and recovery as complete abstinence and avoidence might have made sense, today it doesn’t.
Because in the past decades we have learned so much more about the human condition.
Neuroplasticity is the study of the flexible nature of the brain and teaches the brain is malleable. We can shape our brain by choosing and shaping our experiences.
For decades now we’ve been told and trained to believe that, if we are somehow struggling with overwhelming emotions, our children are “acting out” that we are somehow broken or sick.
We’ve been told, and society now generally believes, that our human struggles with anger, fear, overwhelm are signs of diseased brain yet we now know through decades of research that life experiences shape who we are and how we handle the challenges that life throws at us.
From long-term early life trauma. abuse, and neglect to short term events like bad relationships and even war – it’s our early life experiences, exposure to toxins, the standard american diet – all things that shape how we will respond and if we become emotionally reactive.
The truth is?
We are all a product of our environment and life experiences.
Does that mean that all parents and families are “abusers”?
Not at all.
We know our life or relationships aren’t working – but we don’t know what to do to change those things that aren’t working.
We struggle. We cry. We fight. We think “If (they) would change then everything would be fine”. Or “If they would just do what I tell them to do they would be ok”.
Generational patterns of dysfunction continue to go unnoticed and unchanged because we all want to defend the ones we love and – it’s all we know. It’s our “normal”. We aren’t the ones who are dysfunctional!!
And for those of us who’s parents were clearly abusive and neglectful? We can often end up repeating the patterns in our adult relationships and passing the patterns to our children.
We often end up carrying the blame for being messed up because society and the helping system wants us to “own up” to our problems.
As a famous tv psychologist says “you can’t change what you don’t acknowledge”.
Unfortunately the outcome of that is to continue to blame the ones who have been hurt – for being hurt.
It IS possible to let go of the idea that “I’m just a fuck up” or “something is just WRONG with me” while giving responsibility to those who harmed or hurt us. Or as simple as acknowledging family patterns that may have worked ok in past generations but don’t work so well in this new world of awareness of self and others.
Owning our stuff?
Means also letting go of whats not ours to own.
The secret to creating the change that we want for ourselves doesn’t lie in the idea that we will spend the rest of our lives “managing symptoms”. Nor do we need to “hit bottom” before we seek change. But rather by purposefully and with intent gaining an understanding of where we are on the path, where we’d like to be and a creating a plan and strategy to get there.
Many of us don’t have anything to “recover” or return to which is why the focus is not of “recovery” but of “self discovery”.
RADICAL RECOVERY begins with believing that we can reclaim our power and recover our lives; to go from surviving and settling to living,dreaming and creating the life and relationships we want – and deserve.
We can understand that limiting, restricting, avoiding and abstaining addictive substances is not our “best life” but that by letting go of old ideas – we can have a new life.
Empowering Solutions are the ideas that became the truths that set me free and led me to the fact that all the reading, research, therapy, groups in the world were not doing me a bit of good until I discovered The Practice. The Practice is the daily work of doing things differently that finally gave me the different results I was looking for.
So. Where to begin?
There are plenty of pages, essay’s articles and podcasts to give you an idea of what you can hope for.
I’d like to invite you to explore then send me a message here.
What are you struggling with?
What would you like help to understand and overcome?
Thanks for visiting!
Please take a minute to read more about my journey and passion under the About tab…
I know it can be hard but it’s really only difficult when we don’t know what to do differently to get different results.
I’m glad you’re here and hope to see you again soon!
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