Ok; here we go again. Well intentioned, yes. Misdirected perhaps.
The focus of “learn how to spot an asshole” leaves us externally focused and always wondering “who can I trust” instead of teaching us how to trust ourselves.
SO…with that said I invite you to consider this article (link below) that, by the way, does a great job of identifying emotional manipulation.
The thing I’m going to ask you to look at though is – can I see these traits in MYSELF as part of my own dysfunction and can I have compassion for others journey and struggle instead of making them “less” (this is doing to others what has been done to us) because they might have some of these characteristics?
Remember – we can only live today what we lived yesterday and we WILL repeat the patterns of dysfunction we have learned in our dysfunctional families until we learn how to change OUR patterns of dysfunction.
We cannot change a dysfunctional relationship by trying to change them because that, of course, is part of the pattern of dysfunction; focusing on trying to change/fix or help others instead of focusing on changing ourselves.