There Was A Reason

From the Empowering Solutions Facebook page archives…. There was a reason I struggled and suffered and it wasn’t because something was “wrong” with me but that I’d been conditioned from early on to tolerate the intolerable; to not resist, to surrender my power, to be compliant and obedient. My empowering…

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Narcissists, Psychopaths and Manipulators

Narcissists, Psychopaths and Manipulators

This is a touchy subject, especially for the Walking Wounded. And for years I felt probably similar to many others. I hated, despised and was disgusted by those who had harmed me physically, sexually, emotionally and psychologically. I was enraged at the realization that first my family could wound me…

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It’s In the Story (suffering)

It’s In the Story (suffering)

  I discovered an empowering solution when I understood that my level of suffering was directly related to the story I was telling myself about my circumstances. Was it “horrible” or “unfortunate” that I’d made that mistake? Was it “betrayal” or “their choice” when someone didn’t do as I thought…

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Are You Mad?

Are You Mad?

I’ve often thought that one of the things that would be helpful to teach to both children and adults is to learn how to recognize and resolve those “big feelings”. After all, for survivors of bad things we often end up with lots of big feelings but just as often…

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Complex Trauma

Complex Trauma

Complex trauma is complex because it impacts the development of “self”. This is why most “treatments” are ineffective for trauma survivors from abusive/dysfunctional families; they fail to address these issues as developmental. It only stood to reason for me that if I learned in the drama/trauma and dysfunction how to…

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Breaking the Dance of Dysfunction

Breaking the Dance of Dysfunction

Every now and then I hear from someone who has expressed they did not appreciate something I’ve said or written. And this comes from all sides and on all subjects so it’s not that there is a particular individual that I’m considering as I write this. Rather, this is a…

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Complex Trauma Recovery: it’s not “getting over it” but “getting past it”

Complex Trauma Recovery: it’s not “getting over it” but “getting past it”

It’s important that we are able to tell our stories, to be heard and have our pain, frustrations and justified anger at the losses we experienced at the hand of those who have hurt and harmed us – recognized and honored. Regardless of the source of the abuse or trauma…

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